This weekend, my daughters, Theresa and Catherine, my mom and I made homemade ravioli for Thanksgiving. Ravioli are part of our Thanksgiving tradition, as is having some 30 family and friends for dinner. So no matter how busy we are, the ravioli get made.
Theresa, a sophomore at the University of Michigan, came home for the weekend to help get us in shape for Thursday. She and Catherine, my 16-year-old, not only took the lead in the kitchen, but they readied the basement for big table setting, which takes place Wednesday night and is an event in and of itself.
As the girls and I whirled around each other this weekend and Mom mostly sat and watched, I thought about when Mom's own frenetic holiday preparations began to wane.
It's almost 10 years since Mom made her last batch of Christmas cookies to send to our out-of-town siblings. This baking extravaganza took the better part of a week. Then there was the activity of packaging them up and taking them to UPS, which was Dad's job.
Too consumed in our own frenzied lives, my sisters and I didn't try very hard to convince her otherwise. In fact, we were almost relieved.
Not long after, Mom decided to forego "the manager," which was (is) her single most source of joy at Christmastime. Mom's manager was built over years. Beginning when I was in college, Mom bought more pieces every year until she amassed nearly 50 pieces. They are large and beautifully painted statuettes of the Mary, Joseph, baby Jesus, the three wisemen and their camels, shepherds, farm animals in various positions and an angel. She'd arrange them just so in front of an arrangement of poinsettas and evergreen branches. Strings of white lights lit up at night.
That's when my sister, Theresa, and I stepped in. The cookies we could give up. But the manager was a must.
The holidays are often the first thing to go when an elderly parent finds things getting too unmanageable. The decorations are limited, the baking is drastically reduced
and the shopping might stop altogether.
And when it does, there's always a little bit of joy that seems to get chipped away. But it doesn't need to be.
Personal and companion caregivers can become your parent's holiday helpers as well during this special time of year. Don't hesitate to ask your homecare agency about it.
At BrightStar, we're launching a special holiday preservation program called "Your Personal Elf" to help our elderly citizens keep their traditions alive for their families.
They can provide transportation and escort services to the shopping mall. They can help wrap gifts. They can grocery shop for baking ingredients and help with baking. They can help put up decorations.
We can do as much or as little as the family desires. We want our seniors to continue enjoying these important traditions for themselves as well as their families.
-- Anne Marie Gattari, president of BrightStar of Grosse Pointe / Southeast Macomb, can be reached at 586.279.3610; am.gattari@brightstarcare.com
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